Week 11 Story: The Turtle that couldn't stop talking
Once upon a time, there was a lonely turtle in living in a pond all alone. He saw two geese that were flying south for the winter and they passed by his pond. He called up to them and they flew down to him and they stuck up a conversation. Soon, the three of them became very close friends and they spent the entire winter with the turtle. The turtle showed the two geese around his small little pond and showed them the best places to look for food and where the best places to swim were. However, at the end of winter the geese were leaving to go back to their home. The geese noticed the sad look on the turtle’s face as they were telling him that they needed to go back to their home. As the turtle turned around and began to turn away to head back to the pond, the geese called out to the turtle and asked the him if he would like to join them and go to their home with them so they can continue to be friends. They said they would bring him with them if he did not talk at all along the trip and he said that he would remain quiet. So they brought him a stick that they wanted him to hold onto in his mouth as they carried it. As long as he did not talk he could hold on using his mouth. On the trip he saw a group of children that noticed him flying with the geese. The turtle opened his mouth to try and speak to the children and as a result, he fell to his death. The geese flew down and cried with the town's people. They all mourned the tragic death of the gentle turtle.
The Turtle that Couldn't stop talking
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Bibliography: Jataka Tales Ellen C. Babbitt, Ellsworth Young, 1912
Author's note: This story was sad. The turtle just wanted to make more friends and talk with more people. His kindness and desire to make friends caused his death. The geese made one request of him on their trip and as it turns out disobeying their one rule proved to be the last mistake he ever made. As usual I suck with dialogue so I kept it to the simple story and premise. Hope you enjoy.
Bibliography: Jataka Tales Ellen C. Babbitt, Ellsworth Young, 1912
Whoa! That got dark. Haha
ReplyDeleteWell, I think we can all relate to wishing we had a “quiet stick” we could insist people use, especially at the office haha. I can just see the struggle on his face as he resists talking but finally gives in, knowing he will plummet to his death. Yikes.
Hi, Jake! This story is very good at forcing us to emote. I totally got attached to the turtle through your descriptions. I wish he didn’t have to die but I respect your choice to remain loyal to the original story. Thanks for sharing part of your storytelling journey with us! I look forward to reading future stories. Way to go!
ReplyDeleteNice to meet you Jake!
ReplyDeleteI just got done reading your week 11 story The Turtle that couldn't stop talking, which I must say has been one of the more fun reads I have encountered throughout my readings in this course during this semester. I like the adaptation you took on this jataka, although the dark turn at the end took me by surprise.
Wow that is a little dark! But I think that you did a good job of setting up the story and delivering with good pacing. You mentioned this in you author's note, but even if you "suck at dialogue" I think that we would feel even worse for this character if we heard his own words as he begged to go with his friends. Powerful stuff!
ReplyDeleteHi Jake!
ReplyDeleteWhat a sad story! I think it would help if you added a break somewhere in your first paragraph because it kind of looks like a lengthy blurb at the moment. I admire the way you described the setting and the last sentence was very dramatic - to say the least! I agree with some of the other commenters, about adding more dialogue, because this would add a more personal element to your story. Overall, great work!